Update

So, evidently the fibroid was impressively sized and wrapped rather awkwardly around my uterus. So the doctor had to go full surgery. I have about a 4" bikini-line incision, which feels OK when I don't move too much. If I try to move a lot, though, it hurts. I'm trying to get off the goofballs, so plan on starting work again on Wednesday. If I can stay off the goofballs, I can start driving again, which will make our lives a lot easier.

On another note, the doctor feels as though my fertility should improve which means NOW, at almost 40 years of age, I have to decide on that. I honestly could just slap my old doctor across the face.

A glimpse of the future...

I'm beginning to think I live in a world where the Cubs are going to win the World Series and we're going to have a black president, who will also be a genuinely patriotic president who will lead with intelligence, ration, and the ability to actually make things better.

Don agrees. And also that this might be a harbinger of the apocalypse. He's so cheery.

GYWO

Am I the last person to discover Get Your War On?

Chuck Lorre

I decided to add a new sitcom to my DVR. I love a traditional sitcom right before bed. They soothe me. I've been hearing that The Big Bang Theory is pretty good. I liked that guy on Roseanne. I watched it in bed, chuckled a few times (this guy slayed me). And then at the end and thanks to the miracle of the DVR, I froze over the Chuck Lorre vanity card . And all my peaceful sit-commy good feelings were gone.

Note to Mr. Misogyny: we proud Vagina-Americans have a priority or two beyond making men like us.

Feeling less panicky every day...

When you see an ad like this:



You realize we've got something special. Barack Obama isn't talking about "choice." He comes right out and says the word "abortion." Why? The dude has a pair and isn't afraid to talk to us like we're adults.

I have NEVER seen a candidate like this in my life. Ever. Man, I'm glad he's playing for our team.

Gender Poltics in Kindergarten

This morning, Laney was being intractable about going to school (evidently princesses are home schooled). When I finally got her in the school, she wouldn't go sit in the line. Here's our dialog:

Me: Laney, go sit down!
Laney: I don't WANT to sit next to Kimoni!
Me: That's not very nice. How would you feel if someone said that about you?
Laney: Well, if it was a boy, not too bad.

The kid slays me. Kimoni, by the way, agreed with Laney and was entirely unoffended (if not outright relieved) when she sat next to a girl.

Baseball as a metaphor. Again? That's STILL so trite

Bottom on the 9th. Down by four runs. Two outs. Nobody on. And you WIN that? Kind of makes you believe anything is possible.

Are you fucking kidding me?!?!?!?!

Y'all have GOT to see this one. John McCain has no idea who the President of Spain is, and gets really pissed when called out on it. It's no wonder his flunkie said the press should show deference to Sarah Palin, McCain has grown to expect it.

You know, it's a lot easier not to fuck up when you know what you're talking about. Obama has made no flubs like this. There's an astonishing breadth of knowledge separating the candidates.

And the temperament of the man! Forget Sarah Palin - I don't want THIS guy's finger anywhere near the button:

Testing...

....I'm trying out Google Analytics here. Just a test.

Postcard Campaign (slightly more than 100 words...)

OK - this blogpost is specifically for the equally-politically obsessed Fidalgos. I start my postcard campaign tonight (sending postcards to voters in Ohio). Here's what I plan to write - what do you think:

Dear Voter,
I wanted to write down a few of the reasons why I'm voting for Barack Obama. I hope you'll forgive my awful handwriting.
I am voting for Barack Obama because I think we need a leader who:
• Understands economics in his own right, not someone who will rely on the likes of Phil Graham for economic advice.
• Will always treat war as a last result not as a preferable alternative to aggressive diplomacy
• Wants to make health care available to everyone, not someone who will tax me on my employer-provided health care benefits
• Who findamentally believes that we as Americans have more in common than what divides us
I hope you'll consider voting for Barack Obama for the next president of the United States.

Damn, it's good to have Jon Stewart back...

Baseball as a metaphor. Again? That's SO trite

I went into full-on election freakout last night (Lehman Bros). The more I freaked, the more certain I was of defeat. But then, I noticed the Cubs and turned my obsessive worry from Barack Obama to Carlos Zambrano. I froze at the dining room table for 3 innings, convinced that he'd give up a hit and that it would somehow be my fault when he did. But, he got the no-no. The lesson? If the guy is good enough, he'll get it even if a lot of guys who played for the same team (but weren't as good) didn't.

Old as FUCK

You know, this presidential election has been reassuring on a lot of levels. I love how Sarah Palin (and, y'all, I think I am WORKING an awesome Sarah Palin impression) and Barack Obama are being referred to as "young." I LOVE that. I turn FORTY on my next birthday. This is a shocking, startling number. I hear it and all I can think is "OLD. AS. FUCK." But I still feel like a sprightly young lass. I guess next to John McCain, we all are.

On the plus side...

... all this freaking out I'm doing over the election has COMPLETELY distracted me from the Cubs' collapse. So I got that going for me...

Rainy Day

I've been crabby all day. It's too slow working over a VPN. Democratic hand wringing is annoying. My favorite website has started linking to Sarah Palin apologists and various anti-vegetarian nutbars. The dog is STILL peeing on the rug.

And then we went for a walk in the rain. Laney in groovy new silver sneakers, Ginger overjoyed at being outside. They jumped in every puddle we passed. And, bless my withered old atheist heart, each puddle held a moment of pure grace. When your kid and your dog are jumping in puddles... well, that's living, my friend.

Electoral College

I appreciate that the press needs to feed the beast in order to function. It behooves them for the presidential race to seem really close. But, let's think about this: In 1980, Ronald Reagan won with 50.7% of the popular vote. Of course, that 50.7% represented 489 electoral votes, leaving 49 for poor Jimmy Carter. Interesting how these landslides work, huh? I'm saying it again: Obama gets over 300 EV. And I'm with my friend Big Burt: McCain concedes before the Alaska votes are in.

And if you're really freaking out, send Barack some dough. It makes you feel better.

The first in a continuing theory...

... people are starting to FREAK! McPalin's lies won't work: the press is turning and the populace has turned. Calm down and remember Jimmy Carter (ish):

"Everything is going to be fine. You're very high right now. You will probably be that way for about 57 more days. Try taking some vitamin B complex, vitamin C complex.. if you have a beer, go ahead and drink it..Just remember you're a living organism on this planet, and you're very safe. You've just taken a heavy drug. Relax, stay inside and listen to some music, Okay? Do you have any Allman Brothers?"

Poltical Discourse in the Blogosphere

To clarify from my previous post, for those of you less obsessed with political blogs:

A "wingnut" is how we on the left refer to particularly troglodytic right-wingers. Michelle Malkin and Rush Limbaugh are famous wingnuts. A wingnut isn't just a Republican. A wingnut is a Bush Republican.

A "moonbat" is what those on the right call liberals. They also call you "far left" if you do crazy things like quote them directly. See what Bill O'Reilly calls the "far left liberal website" Media Matters.

Sarah Palin Vlog

I came across this at fellow small-time blogger Paul Fidalgo's blog (actually he's much more big time than me, what with his own wingnut trolls... I would LOVE a wingnut troll). Check out this vlog. Just... well... it's just wonderful:

Baby Daddy

Dear god, can we PLEASE eradicate that phrase from any adult discourse? It's just embarrassing...

A Proud Vagina American

Samantha Bee KILLS me!