Saturday, January 18, 2014

The Shuddering Black Hole of My Memory

Because I have towering technical abilities*, I put a youtube app on my Wii and I use it for yoga videos.

Well, I intend to use it for Yoga videos but instead I sit on my yoga mat and watch music videos from the 80s where I'll giggle at the hair and the smoking and the casual misogyny and then I'll start watching TV theme songs which will then make me think of Too Close for Comfort which will make me remember that one where Monroe got raped by a couple of women so I'll watch that clip and then I stop feeling nostalgic for the 80s because that was so gross also Reagan was president and that was awful no matter how much I weighed 110 pounds (a number lost forever to the endless abyss of The Past).

Also, I'll watch videos I posted there from when Laney was much littler.  Like this one:



And, you guys, I know this is Laney!  This is definitely Laney.  I have vague memories of a short person who would wear dresses and spin.  But, I cannot call it to mind!  The gorgeous, 5' tall be-hoodied girl that I'm trying to figure out how to talk into a training bra before tee-shirt season comes has entirely replaced her.

So here is the question I pose to you:  if your kid is 8, or 10, or 13, or 16, can you call to mind what they were like at 4?  When we're actively doing the rearing (raising?  is it rearing or raising? I know one is for children and the other is for cattle....), are you so in it that you can't recollect earlier stages of being in it?

And when they leave the nest, does it come back?  If your kid is 25 or 30 or 40, can you call to mind the 4 year old them?

Now if y'all will excuse me, I gotta go take some more videos...

* If you would like to share in my towering technical abilities let me share with you the internal monologue that accompanies mine: "[PANIC!][START CRYING JUST A LITTLE] Oh my god, with the endless waterworks! For crying out loud, turn it off.  Is it off?  Turn it back on. [RELIEF][OUTSIZED FEELING OF ACCOMPLISHMENT]"